Look what the turd factory burped up!
Friday, March 12, 2010 
Oy.
I binged on two and a half hours of Bravo last night and have a nasty hangover, so I'm going to let you do all of the talking about Part 2 of the RHOC reunion. What did you think about the husbands? What about Slade as punching bag? When he kept screwing up his timelines and Andy was calling him on it, weren't those silences deafening? I am sore from cringing so much. I have to admit that when Vicki started to throw her tantrum, I turned it off and slipped in the sweet oblivion of a Sex and the City rerun. Vicki sucks ASS.
What about Nene and Jill on WWHL? Nene looked like she had borrowed her entire outfit from Gene Simmons circa 1978, which was kind of AWESOME. But her make-up! It was blinding in its iridescence and gloss.
I know some of you already commented on these matters in the previous post--thank you. You bitches are really on the ball. The rest of you, let it fly right here. Adios, RHOC.
UPDATE: Also see the new jefflewisdesign.com.
Reader Comments (39)
I watched all 3 hours last night....and do you know the feeling you get when you've eaten too many Doritos...followed by a giant brownie because after all that salty crap you HAD to have something sweet and gooey? That sick, foggy headed, dazed feeling??? That's how I felt after the 3 hours.
I watched all 3 hours too! It was fantastic, but I felt really dumb afterwards.
1. Alexis and Jim's smugness is disgusting. He needs to not wear his hair all spiky.
2. Frank's hair looked awful.
3. Lynne's face still looks awful
4. I died from love for AC when he called Slade out on his timeline!
5. I hate Slade. Who is named Slade? Is that a stage name?
6. Bets on when Slade and Gretchen will break up????
7. I heart Don.
8. I kind of liked Tamra last night. I know...weird.
OC is so over rated! They all looked like they were going to my High School Prom 1987! Terrible!
I agree that ALEXIS & JIM are smug its the BEST word!
LYNN & FRANK have smoked too much of the peace pipe!
SLADE SMILEY (WHAT A F*&^ING NAME IS RIGHT!) & GRETCHEN - I love Gretchen but he has got to go! Sorry girlfriend!
VICKI and her temper tantrums are so exhausting - how about when she said to Don, "HELP!" Your big mouth got you into this mess he's not going to help you get out of it!
Tamra was the only one I liked!
BETHENNY - diarrhea of the mouth. She has become so uppity since the BF! Don't like her!
JILLl - too needy! Saw you on LX and you were so over doing it!
LuAnne - very condescending. Rosie - how do I look. You look good you have kept the weight off! Seriously how bad is that house that her daughter flung herself off the balcony to get away and broke both wrists?
RAMONA - Enough all ready! You are not an OLDER VERSION OF CAMERON DIAZ!!
KELLY - Ding F*&^ing Bat - you were not the 40th Anniversary cover - that happened 14 years ago you dumb broad!
ALEX & SIMON - should have stood up to Ramona if she wanted to go to LuAnne's
THIS SEASON IS LOOKING UP!
With all her "fun is gone" whining, Vicki STILL doesn't have the balls to say "I'm not coming back next year"?
Hey guys love you all and love the comments... Totally agree with the Christian comments. What hypocrites! Don't get me wrong I respect all beliefs, even if you don't believe in anything but say it like it is and I am sick of people saying they are christians to mean "I am better, I have better values, this and that". Does not mean shit if you act like an a..hole! Don't use these labels because it is not fooling anyone. Understand the concept first and then tell people you are christian. Alexis is dumb, she cannot even tell if it is OK to change what god gave her. Give me a break. She said she felt good to see Vicki crying in the limo. She kept yelling and fighting through the whole thing. I know better atheists than these two horrible retards... Labels do not describe who you are, your actions do!
Well, Gretchen has a point. If she wants to be used by that slimeball because it makes her happy, then let her be..
I cannot wrap my head around the NYC episode yet..
Did anyone else think Gretchen's forehead was overly botoxed? It had a certain "Klingon" appearance that I had never noticed before.
OMG - Was the reunion not just a total ass clown fest? I mean Alexis and all her "God wants me to feel good about myself so I bought humungous jugs" talk is crazytown! And Lynne - poor Lynne. Get her on Celebrity Rehab before she Anna Nicole's herself. You know it is a shallow pool of intellect when GRETCHEN comes off as sounding smart. And Tamara. Trying so damn hard to be 22 again with all her "Hey Bitch!" talk. It's like she is modeling herself after Regina George. Please do not get me started on Jim's outfit. His hair was the least of his worries.
I have to say Vicki started the season off on the right track - but you could tell it was all fake. All her high road crap was just a way to try to look better than she has the previous seasons. The real Vicki is the judgmental, finger pointing, uppity, overbearing nightmare that she proved to be on the reunion. I kind of loved it that when grilled last night, she admitted that she doesn't know why she doesn't like Slade. I mean, it's easy to take jabs at that douche nozzle but seriously, if you are going to go to the extent you go to Vik, have an ace in the whole as to why you don't like him. Don't just get up and walk away. It proves that you really can't justify your shit behavior!!! You don't like him because he wants to be on the show every season? Um. Vikki. So do you babe. And you won't walk away either because you would rather be hated on TV than ignored in real life.
These people are the definition of tacky.
i am disgusted by how chummy alexis and gretchen are, as well as slade and jim! those two couples stink and need to get off the show. i hate how alexis winked at jim, yuck. also, slade is a liar all the way, and andy cohen was totally right for calling him out on his lies. also, jim was completely rude to andy, saying i want to be the kind of man you are andy! thank god andy is light years smarter than jim, and had a witty comment of to shoot back at jim. i felt bad for vicki, they were all attacking her and poor don was too nice to give it right back to gretchen and alexis. sooo over the oc bitches.
Slade's explanations about Laurie made him even a bigger douche. He "just" slept with her...isn't that the point??
I cannot stomach Slade, Alexis or Jim. Andy did his best to put them in their place, but I was hoping (so badly) that someone would chime in and call them out on more of their bull.
I think they need to have a live audience at these reunions!
Please sit up straight.
I need to lose a bunch of weight. I may just fast for Jim & Alexis.
I'm on the "Vicki Sucks" train. She's just beyond hope. And although the one thing Vicki and I agree on is that Slade sucks, I thought Gretchen was SPOT ON when she kept telling Vicki to take it up with Slade, and then Vicki just mimicked back whatever Gretchen had just said. Vicki looked clueless. You're off your game, Vic.
I've always not hated Gretchen (which is as close to "liking" somebody as it gets on this show), and like another commenter, I was surprised at how much I was not hating Tamera also. Except during the "Slade pimps Gretchen out" argument, which Tamera shouldn't have been talking about because right up until their divorce, Tamera and Simon were giving interviews to Radar Online during their dinner dates. I think that might be what Gretchen meant when she was talking about not keeping things private, because most of those silly interviews involved Gretchen bashing. But other than that, Tamara wasn't looking all that bad.
Lynn's poor daughters don't stand a chance. Lynn went back and forth between calling her daughter a manipulator and saying that she's perfectly fine. And in one sentence she'd say "Alexa does that because she knows she can get away with it!" and in the next sentence she'd say "Alexa doesn't get away with anything." Oh, Lynn.
With RHONY, I love their blogs this season. They are so juicy. Although I've always not hated Jill Zarin (and your accent is TO DIE FOR, SGM), I'm kind of hating her after that speaker phone call. What a mess. I hope this is a juicy NY season to make up for the OC season that felt like it would never end. Oy.
Also, does anyone else think that Jeff Lewis' whiskers have a magical glow to them on his new website? I think I just stared at them for 15 minutes. It might just be me. I love staring at him.
And I'm going to join JenJen in fasting for Jim & Alexis. Alexis will never take me seriously at my size and since it's almost summer, I should stop eating anyway a la Tamera.
Just a little RH gossip for you ... Boston Casting sent out emails yesterday for casting the next new group of Real Housewives!
Real Housewives of Boston might be a little boring to be honest, New Englanders just don't know how to flaunt their money like OC'ers and Jersey gals. But will I tune in? Obviously.
There is a televangelist missing an outfit somewhere...
Andy catching Slade in a lie: I didn't get the significance. Five months vs. seven months--What was the big revelation?
(KELLY - Ding F*&^ing Bat - you were not the 40th Anniversary cover - that happened 14 years ago you dumb broad!)
I didn't even think about this at the time... and she was SO proud! LMAO
Why is Vicky so bewildered when people react to the mean things she says? Surely she can understand when you say mean things people won't like it--or you and will fight back? It's not fun anymore because she is a bully who has been defeated.
The level of maturity (none) of the NY housewives last night made me think there'd been no break between the end of OC and the beginning of NY. Whomever said they should be limited to one season might be right. Btw Jill, even if you think someone isn't going to say anything "wrong" you tell them immediately you have them on speaker and who else is listening. And Alex, they're only being nice to you because they're attacking each other. Take a lesson from Jeana and get outta there.
Uhggg....that whirlwind of 3 episodes back-to-back-to back made my head spin. By the time Alex was calling in her regards to Camp Luanne I was spent! I'm glad there's a 7 day break with all this. The best for me was Jeanna getting so snarky about Tamra's woes. "you cried like it was yesterday!" was classic! Then our gals Kelley's blown up description of her COVER and 10 Page spread for playboy? UHMMMM..(cough) bullshit. Way to hype that whole situation lady! So ll this is some how reality? I dunno about you all but I don't and don't know ANYONE that carries on like this with friends and neighboors. It's all a bit to much at this stage of the game.
I am with you Gina on all your points
Gretchen, she looked a little washed out on the reunion show, maybe it was the makeup? .........her makeup line? she just didn't look as pretty as she has. Slade, ugh and what is it with his name, Slade sounds like a porno name, he probably made it up himself, plus all the lies from those 2, wonder if they go to church w/the Jim and Alexis
Andy was great with his questions, gosh I love that Andy Cohen
Alexis sorta looks like a drag queen sometimes [I's been watching too much RuPaul 's drag race]
Housewives Hangover is all I have to say! (and BTW, Alex, you got the last minute invite)
I read on some Luanne's blog (at least I think it was her blog) that Kelly had her children at her Playboy photo shoot. Those poor children.
Thank you for noticing.
I just can't get over how weird Gretchen was looking. It kinda reminds me of that lunch at Alexis' house. I'm attributing it to a few things: her hair is parted in the middle and does not flatter, her eyes look all droopy, her skin isn't looking great...it's usually a lot more luminous. But you can't hate on how great she looked in that dress...she must have fasted (for Alexis) for days to look that good.