Dreams for sale!
Tuesday, January 26, 2010 First Kim Zolciak put her exquisite evening gowns on the market, and now Kelly Bensimon is offering the ultimate piece of Real Housewives history: THE GREEN BRASS MONKEY DRESS.
OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT! Bidding starts at $49.99 and the size is XS (i.e. stretched out). Ten percent of the proceeds will go to the Red Cross. A whole $4.99 to the Red Cross! Very generous. Autographed photo of Kelly included.
Look at her:
Is that a sense of humor I see? Maybe it's just gas. But I think I might be starting to like her a little bit! (but don't tell anyone because I will deny it.)
I can't help but picture myself prancing around town in this number, scoffing at people, judging their energy and telling them that they are being "rully rully inappropriate."
I can barely breathe right now.
To the other Real Housewives cast members: time to up the ante. Danielle, I'm thinking that you can sign your copy of Cop without a Badge and pair it with an eightball and a free session with your eyebrow waxer. Tamra, you can sell your engagement ring (fingers crossed it's not CZ, girl!), and Bethenny, I suggest auctioning off the right to name your unborn child and donating 11% to charity. I know you've already thought about it, so get on it already!
Anything that you want? Name it. Also, if you're going to bid on any of Kelly's items, you'd damn well better let me know.
SGM
Reader Comments (16)
hahaha .... eyebrow waxer... you kill me
Looks like Kim's dresses have already been significantly discounted. Not 49.99 yet but maybe tomorrow.
only if it smells like skank will i bid.
I might bid on this...after drinking a whole lot of Brass Monkey.
Albie Manzo's workout gear. (BACK OFF, SGM.)
Hahahah, you guys are geniuses!!! Albie Manzo's workout gear, hell yeaaahhh!!!
What sane person would not want this treasured piece of Americana? I can hardly wait until her target bathroom mats are auctioned.
why oh why oh why are those pink boots not for sale???!!!
Does the dress come with the hot pink wellies and Max?
How is she an XS?
Zakary - The exact same way that Kim Z. is a size 4! Those are Mars sizes, apparently!
TEN PERCENT to charity?!?!
This, from a lady with a $10 million house in the Hamptons?
OMG - look at my hair! it's just so awesome! byeeee!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jaqlTAXl6rw
While I'm at it... this from the woman who is not only rullly rullly generous with the 10% donations to Red Cross, but who otherwise does not put her name on charity events....
http://www.hs.facebook.com/posted.php?id=156187357879&share_id=296145014738&comments=1#/photo.php?pid=3166802&id=156187357879
Someone beat me to the pink wellies .... but I do question how misshaped it must be from her ill fitting breasts. Is there a reason she isn't donating the entire proceeds to the Red Cross? Cheap bitch that she is.
Glossy, you make my day every time! LOL @ the Polyvore collage!!!!!!!!! Brilliant!!!
re: her eBay auction: I am puzzled as to WHY she bought two of the books SHE HERSELF WROTE (check her feedback as a buyer) [insert confused smiley here].
XO
I.