Do not look directly at this post
Saturday, October 17, 2009 
I warned you! Are your eyes burning? I think I moaned in agony and clutched my stomach when I first saw this photo. I have looked at it several times today in order to punish myself for not having your Flipping Out recap (trust me--way worse than wearing a smock in public). Chad and Patti are bad enough on their own, but together they form the Axis of Smarm. Bravo has this photo and many more on its website just...out there, waiting to scare the bejesus out of people.
Want to see more? Of course you do.
Guess what?
It's cooter time! Cover it UP, Kelly.
Gretchen looks fabulous here, and I think Slade is kind of hot for a deadbeat dad.
On the flip side of the pretty coin is this:
BEASTS.
Scratch Ramona's suit, then sniff.
Mothballs and Primo (the Giorgio Imposters perfume)(which you will TOTALLY understand if you were a teenager in the 80s).
And finally, SHREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
I have this vision in my head of Patti and Kim splitting her like a wishbone and roasting up those meaty thighs for dinner. GROSS but strangely plausible.
More photos here, if you dare.
Reader Comments (21)
Bravo TV has taught me nothing if not this: There are thousands of douche bags who live in LA.
"I have this vision in my head of Patti and Kim splitting her like a wishbone and roasting up those meaty thighs for dinner."
That might be the funniest thing I have ever read on the Internet, SGM.
You are a comedy goddess to me.
What the hell is wrong with Kelly's left leg?
You crack me up.
"It's cooter time!" Girl, you made me laugh out loud for the first time in a week and for that you deserve my undying affection!
Wonder if the neon bra she is wearing underneath that white shirt (?) is She by Sheree? God what an awful get up.
OMG, it's a train wreck and I can't not look!!!!!
And I used to save my allowance to buy Primo.
In bulk.
Slade must have a foot-long - otherwise, I cannot understand how he is the ManToy of all the young RHs. He is passed around like a party bong.
I hate Sheree so much I can't even make a joke about it.
Is that she by Sheree? OMG she looks a mess sorry sister
and chad, I just want to mess up his hair
dear christ shreeeee is built!! she would crack you in half like a christmas nut with those things.
hell yeah i remember primo. i remember it smelled nothing like giorgio and tons like ass.
Slade is some what of a reality ho and Kim...........I got nothing to say about her I think just looking at her and them freaking boobs on the fake hair like way over $12000 a year!!!
WTF where does she get the $$$$$$$ Big Poppa must still support her even when they are broken up
I heard Kelly is posing for playboy?!? Yowsa... I heard this on Howard Stern, who I love, and he said that he is good friends with her and all her buddies call her KiKi... I am so blown away that she actually has friends and that one of them is Howard Stern.
You're hysterical SGM! I think Patti (Millionaire Matchmaker) and Sheree were at one time, and may possibly still be men.
How fitting of Sheree to inconspicuously pose in front of the Hennessy logo while on the Step and Repeat....
Sherereh needs to burn that outfit!
B. Scott has a really good interview up on YT with Kim.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEDW2V6LMII
Sheree - Lose the bangs! And praise the stylist who whacked off Patti's bangs!
You are seriously the funniest mo fo on the internet.
I love it all, thanks SGM!
Sha-Ray is scary and horrid. Thank god we can utilize the power of the interenet to make fun of her. She could probably split me in half.
Kim said she spends over $12K a MONTH on wigs...well...that's a lot of cash money, just to look a hot mess.
I am so perplexed by Sheree's outfit. Did she come from the beach? Because there appears to be a hot pink bandeau top underneath her tee. I bet you she reads this and adds a srcatch n sniff outfit to her next collection!!
the hair issues alone in the first photo are enough to scare anyone.
Chad and Patti are like two transgendered Cher spawn.
(I should say "...two MORE transgendered Cher spawn.")