Because we do NOT shy away from controversy
Wednesday, June 22, 2011 Please welcome one of my favorite people to the blog, my friend Edie, aka Mommy E (her street name). You may remember her from the blogs I Could Kill Her and Miss In Your Business--RIP to them both, as they have passed on to internet heaven. Edie and I share many interests, including frozen Milky Ways, Marky Mark, and now the Real Housewives of New Jersey. This is her position statement on Caroline Manzo. Read it, consider it, and then LET'S GET IT ON in the comments.
Caroline Manzo is a bad mother – there…I said it!
I have this theory about women who constantly find subtle and not so subtle ways to let people know that they are amazing mothers: these women are always TERRIBLE MOTHERS!!
Example: Pamela Anderson – in almost every interview, Pam redundantly describes what a “normal mother” she is and how she’s so busy bringing orange slices to her kids’ soccer games, she hardly has any time to notice the various magazine articles describing her as a skank, ho, etc. Pam makes a huge point of telling everyone who will listen that she’s this amazing mom. That mommyhood is all that matters. That her boys come first. That her kitchen is stocked with organic, gluten-free, soy popsicles. That she’s turning down Oscar-potential gig after gig in order to be there for parent-teacher conferences, “volunteer work” at the school, and carpool.
And I totally start buying into it.
And then I see this
And then I snap the hell out of it.
I feel the same way about Caroline Manzo. She’s a blowhard mom. Caroline spends all her on-air time trying to convince us viewers that she’s such an amazing mother. That it’s all about “the children.”
Yeah, not so much says this Jew.
Caroline perfectly exemplifies my theory. A few examples:
The “cozy Sunday family cooking episode”: Was I the only watching who thought to myself “this woman HATES black people!” The obvious animosity/superiority/judgment she displayed while discussing their “experiment” with very unusual food such as fried chicken.
Can you imagine the show that would go down if her (not very) precious Lauren brought a black man home? It would be like Jungle Fever II! And selfishly, that is some shit I’d like to see on the television. Come on Lauren, do us all a favor and bring home some flavor.
And speaking of Lauren: let’s just hope that the girl doesn’t end up on the pole in five years because clearly her momma loves her brothers a hell of a lot more than she loves her.
The borderline inappropriate love of son Albie? Um, I’m sure Albie is a great guy and everything but come on…creepy. And the fact that they’re not disclosing why he got kicked out of law school…it makes me feel like how I feel when I read a young person’s obituary: I firmly believe that if you want an obituary of a young person printed in the newspaper, you should be required to disclose the cause of death. How dare you leave me wondering!
Obviously Caroline got a chance to see what an angry, violent, bully we all saw her to be last season so this season she’s trying to be all “I’m not getting involved…this is not my battle…take it out of my house ladies” (yeah, not your house…your husband’s catering building)
Oh Puleassse…. We know you Caroline. Stop frontin’ and trying to appear like some educated, well-respected, fancy lady.
You’re ghetto and you know it. But not the good kind of ghetto.
Sincerely,
Mommy E
Reader Comments (29)
Animal House 4 Life.
Edie is obviously completely bigoted against Italians.
Nah, I don't really think so but it kinda sucks to have someone just say shit about you out of left field just to be combative.
I'm with The Real Housegay of Toledo on this. You're reaching Edie. You reached so far amusement factor toppled off a cliff into a dark and ugly ravine.
Don't be that person.
Oh, Townhouse Lady. One day you will make me laugh...
Well, I've done a 360 with Caroline. Al said something of great interest last week on MANZOED with CHILDREN. He basically said we have created these children and taught them how we want them to behave. In other words, Lauren mirrors her mother's snide and nasty behaviors when it comes to other women. Her treatment of the son's girlfriend was deplorable. These Italian families are way too close for comfort sometimes. I want to smack the crap out of Lauren. Meanwhile, she's now thinner than her mother who is getting jowly and unpleasant. She wears her anger on her face. If the rumor is true about her husband's longtime affair and she condones it, well, no wonder there is misplaced anger towards the daughter and the son's girlfriends. And these kids need to live on their own and sink or swim: it's obvious that the restaurants and BLAK (wtf?) and everything else have just been handed to them. This woman is F@#$ed up!