Thursday
Mar042010
Double-header tonight!
Thursday, March 4, 2010 And I'm not talking about the writhing, drunken monster that is Raquel and Alexa Curtin. Oh, no! Tonight we are blessed with the Real Housewives of Orange County finale that no one really cares about (except me?) and then the long-awaited premiere of Season 3 of the Real Housewives of New York City.
Personally, I cannot wait for a good healthy dose of Kelly Bensimon's gibberish (get a taste of it here), and I plan to make this face:
at least 7 times tonight.
We'll reconvene here after it all goes down!
Click below for the latest RHOC radio recap with Mason of Seattle's Movin 92.5 (warning: Missouri will be DEFENDED.)
Reader Comments (30)
Kelly's best lines:
"That's not a friend. That's a foe."
"She invented the margarita." [disapprovingly, about Bethenny]
Wow, those NYC women are back with a vengeance. Thanks, SGM, for your recaps and witty commentary!
Does anyone here read Richard Lawson @ Gawker? I would never read him *instead* of SGM---only AFTERWARDS. SGM is much funnier!
Richard's recaps are different, but still funny. He posts some kick-ass commentary on our favorite NYC gals.
ANYWAY, my dislike of Bethenny goes back to the very first minute she appeared on my screen so I wanted to quote dear Richard on what he said February of 2009, as the second season began on Bravo.
"Bethenny
The non-married career girl of the bunch, Bethenny doesn't exactly fit the thesis of the show. But whatever. Wine-faced and tired looking, Bethenny makes healthy "gourmet" food for people and tries to fashion herself into some sort of Uptown wiseacre Martha Stewart. Honestly, Bethenny isn't all that bad. That is when she isn't crowing about her "SkinnyGirl Margaritas" (tequila and a lime spritz) or saying "Oh no she di'n't" in fake black girl cadences. This season look for more crowing about SkinnyGirl Margaritas and saying of "Oh no she di'n't" in fake black girl cadences."
The one line---"Wine-faced and tired looking," has never NOT been funny to me. Watching Andy C's show last night with Bethenny brought up that old quote (and of course, the questions here about Beth's appearance and resemblance to the Joker/Michael Jackson only reinforced the above quote and had me in stitches.) Again.
No doubt (!!!) Jill Zarin is an oxygen-thief, but without her (as Bethenny has sung from the rooftops), Beth would never even be a castmember on this show.
Jill was cast and asked Bethenny, repeatedly to join, and if you followed this series, Bethenny has said, many times, that the first season was 7 or 8 episodes and the real reason Bethenny isn't in every episode was that Jill was still negotiating (in favor of the 2nd runner-up of Martha Stewart's /Donald Trump reality show loser, once removed). I think that without Jill, Bethenny would be the second place Martha Stewart girl (the one who embarrased herself by telling anyone who would listen that SHE was supposed to win and maligning the actual winner). Jill literally DRAGGED Bethenny onto the series. It was a hit and because of that, Bethenny had her NY Times Bestseller.
I would NEVER wear the tacky "Team Jill" shirt we have seen in the window of Zaaaaarin Fabrics, but if I had to take sides.....the wine-faced and tired one has no appeal. Last season, Bethenny and Jill were the mean girls. This shift in alliances will keep things interesting. Thank GOD Bobby is okay. (Gotta agree with Jill that sending flowers was super-generic). We'll see......
What made RHONY better than RHOC was that I actually had people to cheer for, I loved the friendship of Bethanny and Jill. I liked that Bethanny was like a Greek Chorus when she'd call out the stupid antics of others. I hated her "No she di nt," stuff and when she took it too far. Now I don't have anyone to cheer for on either show and it's just like being in 8th grade!
Scene: Season One - Bravo sets up the first meeting between Alex and Bethenny. Alex looking at her phone: 'I just got a text from my husband and he can't decide whether to wear the light or the dark boots'. Bethenny, having never met Simon: 'Oh my God. Tell your husband he is in the midst of a deep homosexual panic'.
That is the funny off the cuff Bethenny I hung on to all of last season. I think that Bethenny is gone and now we just have the chick whose main talent is the art of self-promotion. I am sad for her. Now all I have left is this clip. http://www.bravotv.com/the-real-housewives-of-new-york-city/videos/one-liners
Anony - you nailed it. She's going to fuck up that kid in the biggest way.
SGM- you, however, still bring the funny in a big way.
I think we're all falling into the same pattern Jill probably fell into: Expecting Bethenny to stay frozen in time. We want her to be the court jester, playing the same shtick-y part, and now we're frustrated: "Hey court jester, why'd you stop jesting?" She's probably bored and impatient and ready to move on from the Housewives. I'm not saying I have any respect for the whole skinnygirl enterprise--I don't, really--but I do understand her need to move on.