Monday
Feb162009
Yanked-up faces and such
Monday, February 16, 2009 
"Girls, I've heard that the History of a Modern Hoochie exhibit at Bebe is marvelous. Let's take a look, shall we?"
I mean, just look at these women and how they’re presented, the raccoon eyes and the god-awful fake breasts, the fried hair and yanked-up faces. Are any of them ever shown reading a book or seeing a play? Visiting a museum (for the record, the Galleria is not one), picking up a newspaper or having a conversation about anything that mattered at all? Of course not. These housewives of Orange County are too busy downing tequila shooters, redecorating their redecorated houses, admiring their cosmetic surgery and wondering why their kids are so screwed up (!) to have actual lives.
Is that not the most concisely perfect description of the OC women?! Check out the entire article--you will feel shame for watching, yet will also feel superior because, unlike Vicki et al, you are reading a newspaper article.
2. Who is the hot mama (or surrogate mama, as the case may be) with Andy Cohen?
Find the answer here. Stunning.
3. Bravo is hosting a RHNYC party tomorrow at Sephora in NYC, and you, my friends, are invited. There will be gift bags and the Countess will be giving foot masages to the first 50 people. Just kidding on that last part, but there will be massages. All you need to do is bring the invitation found here. Those of you in NYC, please check it out and report back.
I am giddy with excitement for the double-feature of trash tomorrow--see you then!
Reader Comments (10)
Yay, yay, yay - I can't wait eather, especially for your whitty re-cap. I'm already on pins & needles...
Thanks for supplying me with my necessary OC reality dosage today : )
"these women will no doubt remain right where we all want them to be: trapped in the fabulous shabbiness of their lives, having conversations that run back and forth like trained rats along dim and narrow mazes of the mundane."
Brilliant.
Cannot wait for the NYC circus (and subsequent recaps) to begin!
Man, I'm not a fan of the RHONYC. I'm not sure why, but they're kooky in a way that makes my stomach hurt. RHOC are kooky in a way that only makes my head hurt, which is much more tolerable.
But I'll still watch it! Oh yes I will!
I heard through some Ferris Bueller-like connection (my best friend's sister's boyfriend, et al) that one of the Ho-Testants on Rock of Love (aka the mobile skank pod) is the daughter of the recently deceased husband of a Real Housewife of OC. Did you know this or is it old news?
Thanks for the tip! I love trash TV AND reading. Mostly reading about trash TV, but still.
One note about the RHNYC promo shot:
In the typical composite photos of the housewives, it at least looks like they *could* *possibly* be standing together, but for this photo they clearly just gave up. This was probably put together with glue stick and a photocopier. It seems we're over even pretending that they could be bothered with sharing anything with one another.
Wow, Mary Mcnamara's article IS excellent!
Looking forward to RHONYC.
That was priceless and completely spot on! The funny thing is that I bet the ladies of the OC will have to pull out a dictionery to understand that article.
P.S. I can't wait to hear what you say about the New York episodes!
1) See that mall that they're in? That's called South Coast Plaza and it's where all the fake boobed overly tanned womenz of OC go to get their shop on. If you're ever in town either avoid it like the plague or go for some great "WTF is she WEARING?!" moments.
Can't wait for your RHONYC recap! Please tell me you'll do Millionaire Matchmaker! I know you have a lot on your plate, but that show is freaking hilarious.
omg one minute where I live! OH EXCITEMENT!!!
i love your recaps on RHOC
but...
I HATE VICKI!
Everything about her. Mostly the things that she said about Gretchen. I love her.
I hate Vicki. I wanna be on Team Donn.